Oh no! Have you been going through the motions of life and realized that you don’t have a why or your why seems very small? A “why” is your reason to learn, take action, and set goals that will benefit you and others. If you don’t have your own, you may find yourself struggling often!
Having a “why” feels like having a source of motivation or warmth that keeps you living your life in the best way that you can. If you’re not careful, you may find yourself in an unfulfilled situation that you want to get out of. Nobody wants to be in this situation right?
Having a reason to keep doing your best is necessary to avoid many unwanted situations
I’m sure you can also name a few situations where you’ve found yourself doing poorly in something because your passion was not there! For example, have you lost focus doing boring activities? I’m sure we have all been there! Having a good grasp on your motivation can help you power through things you don’t want to do to reach your goals!
To discover your “why”, you have to become in tune with yourself! This takes observation, asking questions, learning, and sometimes more. Here are a few examples of what having a “why” can look like.
Examples of having a “why”:
- Person A: “I go outside of my comfort zone because I know that someone will see me and feel inspired to do the same. Inspiration keeps the world going and I want to be a part of that.”
- Person B: “I look for people that need help and I figure out ways to help them because helping people makes me feel good inside.”
- Person C: “My main goal in life is to become an expert in something so that I can teach my community. My community has helped me and I want to return the favor.”
Some people do things because they want to influence the world, feel good through acts of kindness, pay back debts, etc. The main idea to get from this is that your “why” can look different from those around you. And that’s okay! Find your “why” and make a difference!
If you’d like to work on improving your observation skills, try meditation. Check out my easy 3 step method to meditate. Now that you know why you should find your “why”, here are 3 things you can do to find your motivation or your “why”.
1. Ask the people closest to you, “What do you think I am good at or would be good at?”
Finding out the things that people think you’re good at can give you an idea of what area you’ve spent most of your time improving. Asking yourself why you spent so much time improving your skill can push you in the right direction. Which direction is that you may ask? The direction toward figuring out what has been pushing you toward a better self this whole time. Behind most talents is a bunch of practice a person has put into having a talent. What was it that drove you to practice?
It’s nice to get a second opinion! If you ask a group of people what they think you’d be good at, you may be surprised by their answers. You can ask family, friends, associates, and even strangers if you’re up to it.
It can be hard brainstorming alone so that’s why getting others involved can be a good thing!
Each person has a different view of you that may differ from your view of yourself. Finding out these views will open your eyes to some possibilities to chase. When I ask for a second opinion from someone, it’s like digging into a box of information. You can take the information you receive and use it or choose not to use it. The choice is yours to make because it’s your life!
Most people have something they are naturally talented at. It can be something as simple as talking for long periods, avoiding people, or choosing good restaurants to dine in.
There are things you can do that you wouldn’t believe others when they say they need help with doing the same! Don’t count yourself out! Skills are meant to be improved so don’t worry if you think that your skills aren’t good enough to make a difference. If you’re looking to become more creative, check out my neat ways to become creative.
At your current level which you may consider average, there is always someone who is just starting that may need you to help or inspire them to become better.
2. Take a personality test
A personality test can help you discover your “why” because they are very detailed with the questions they ask. They make you think! Try one out of this list of personality tests that help you learn about yourself.
A few helpful personality tests for finding your “why”:
Personality tests have been created by using a lot of data from people with differences and similarities. These assessments can help you discover things about yourself that you were unaware of. Some of them give you suggestions about hobbies or careers people with your personality should try. They’re kind of amazing!
After taking a few personality tests, I was able to choose a career to thrive in and also navigate my relationships better. Being able to know myself better has helped me with discovering what brings me the most joy in life. I dare you to take a chance!
3. Just be yourself
You can be yourself by slowly breaking away from the things you don’t agree with. One reason your drive may be missing or small is that you are putting on an act. Society has molded you into someone you’re not! It’s time to break free and become comfortable in your skin!
Have you been following the expected goals that people have placed on you? Some say you must get a job and become a respectable adult. Take a look at your views about this. Yes, you should be able to support yourself but supporting yourself can look different than what your parents, community, and others want it to look like.
You may see your friends doing the things they love often. But you, on the other hand, wanted to live life the right way so you followed a specific set of steps. Or maybe you at least tried to? It’s time to explore what makes you happier than what society has wanted for you.
A few ways to be yourself as an adult:
- Research the different kinds of hobbies you can get into
- Join some clubs through an app like Meetup.com
Meetup offers local and virtual clubs put together by everyday people with similar interests as you - Revisit some of your past passions
Were these tips helpful? Don’t be shy, let’s start a discussion in the comments! We are in this world together and I’d love your insight!
